To find love, whether to feel loved or be able to love, we can start by acknowledging various aspects and ingredients, that I called "The Keys to Paradise" in my book "The Call for Divine Mothering". Naturally, trust is also one.
This morning, I received some inspiration about that. I feel like I can hear from a distance, sometimes. It's like overhearing conversations by someone talking about something I have written, said or done, but whether this is real or just something that is part of my thoughts, I don't know. So, this morning, I felt like the US Embassy in Stockholm, might think of my removal as a breach of trust against them. That is, that they trusted me and I broke their trust. This perspective hasn't occurred to me, until today. I, of course, feel betrayed just as well, but not by the US Embassy, who I do hold in high regard and gratitude. It was simply an assumption by Hawaii Pacific University that they could hold me (ie get paid for) for 5 years of classes. In the visa, however, also was taking into account, to be able to do internships, sell books, perhaps get married, and work, first on campus and then eventually also with another visa.
Back to the issue: Trust. I have found lately, that I trust others much less, especially in Sweden, than I used to. This has to do with not getting my cases tried, less discussed in the news, including selling books. Why on earth doesn't the Swedish police and courts try neither the stalking, including burglaries, nor the libel and copyright infringements? And why am I being stopped from paying my rent monthly, put in a systematic decision making? Isn't my transparency enough? Not to mention, why was the treatment by ICE that I received not questioned?
What I have learned though, is to trust myself better. To trust my own handling of money, to trust my own judgment, and to trust in my own professional ability, capacity and competence, both as a copywriter and as a lifecoach. I can also trust my own emotional processes and my resilience, my experiences and my faith.
Do you trust in others? Do you trust in yourself? And do others trust you?
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