Most of my childhood and teenage years, were in new towns and schools. Therefore, after moving from my first bestie Fredrika in 3rd grade, I became part of a pair of friends who already was: Louise and Åsa. And in the next town, it became the same. I was either friends with one, or both, but very rarely have I've been someone's only bestie. Luckily, I had Annica by my side in my teens. She later became a pilot and I a copywriter, like we planned in her girl's room. We also travelled together in our early 20's. And since she also went to the United States for her education, we had our stays in common and most of all, how it had changed us. When I returned from my year, I also became a member of an alumni organization for exchange students.
As a grown up, this pattern has still had its hold on me. New girlfriends have either come in pairs, or in part, but never full. How is this? I understand it simply as being the result of many moves. Most people tend to keep their childhood friends and classmates, also as adults. Since we've moved (and I) a lot, naturally I haven't been able to keep my relations in person. And I have also changed profession. Unless, there is something else? My parents' divorce? Or that I prefer to be the leader? I've often taken the initiative, but feel like I don't want to do that all the time. On the other hand, I prefer deciding what to do and where to go. This improved for the better, as a Christian, unless it's simply common maturity. Often, relationships tend to become gossip building, or exhausting shares of what has been going on at work or in marriages, but seldom about doing things. Sadly also because of my lack of income, or student loan. Do you think I want to ask for money all the time? Now, I simply feel like I need to move and settle, where I want to be first, before building new relationships.