Finding a feeling
I think most people, most of the time, are in a constant series of reactions within their relationships. And with relationships, I don't only mean a significant other, but also friends, relatives and co-workers. Or even your online followers. If we feel really provoked or exhausted, we might even react to our own feeling and feel even worse! We might step away, become empty but then end right back into the same cycle. How does one then change this?
One way is through meditation and growing in self-awareness: What am I feeling right now and why? Through meditation, we can turn inwardly and peel off layer by layer, until we reach a core of peace. From this point, we feel neither empty, nor full, just peace. After relaxing and centrering ourselves into this core of peace, we can start going outwards again but instead create the feelings we want. We can't stop reacting and shouldn't of course, but we can start each interaction from a created point of view, with a deliberate intent grounded in acceptance, curiosity and compassion, for example. This way, we can begin to create love. We can focus on what we like about the person, if we are familiar with him or her, or assume something good about him or her. From this point, there is no need to be neither defensive, nor offensive, but just be present. And what others feel is their business.