How do we best let our inner child out to play? By playing with others of course! By having fun, by creating things, by exploring little paths in nature, by flirting, singing and dancing and trying on clothes. Or else it will be miserable and feed the ego. It also needs to have its basic needs met, such as food, shelter, belonging, safety and sleep. Our emotions can come from two places:
1. Ego - often by disappointment, envy, jealousy, feeling sorry for yourself, just wanting attention or even happiness when we got what we wanted, affects self confidence
2. Soul - from our existential angst, expressions seated deeply in our souls where life and death are questioned, in need of others attention for support and validation, affects self esteem
It seems like people don't know the difference, (I learned about this in 1995 through a personal relationship) unless you have survived an actual trauma, or perhaps allowed your Ego to put you into thoughts of unworthiness. Do not confuse these two, especially in others, just like we shouldn't suppress or "overcome" fears that save us from harm by instinct. The only way to overcome any fear is with love once we feel safe. A hug is good!
How do we then decide how to proceed? We ask our Higher self (Divine connected/Parent-self) to be in charge with intuition and humility, while our Middle self (Ego/Personality/Adult-self) communicates and acts in harmony with our Lower self (Soul/Subconscious/Child-self) who expresses its needs or acts out them when we don't care for ourselves.
So, how are you feeling today? Feelings, finally, are temporary based on the day. (This too like the ocean wave, shall pass.) The nuclear family (ie father, mother and child) is usually the arena where we practice this integration on the outside, just like with all our relationships. Understanding the process from within by growing awareness and being attentive to our own behavior makes it possible to reflect in action with mindfulness and become better at choosing approach in our communication and action.
The Hawaiian way of explaining this can be read about in "Urban Shamanism" by Serge Kahili King, just like most psychology schools refer to the same which in turn also connotates with the Christian Trinity. We reach more integration by praying the Ho'oponopono prayer by Morrnah Simenoa, starting with "Divine Father, Mother, Child as one, if I (your name and family) has in any way harmed or hurt (the other's name and ancestors), past, present and future…" . It is by doing this prayer from my heart, I found my connection to my inner child together with receiving Lomilomi treatments (Hawaiian healing massage).