Making time for love

Two days ago, I drew a card from my Medicine Woman deck for this new year, to think about and improve for myself. And this came up - Ace of Bowls (Cups in traditional Tarot)! This to me, means to open my heart again for love, which when I think about it, I really haven't this last year. It made me think about that I need to make time for love. My schedule that I live by, doesn't reallly have any available slots for dating and socializing. Some of it is my own decision, that I can change. And some of it has become a necessity.

Today again, I have had to endure for example 3 hours of waiting to log back in and write this blogpost that I started, because I was again stalked by Daniel Andersson and blocked from doing so. So, instead of being done 4.30 pm and then have the evening to my friends or boyfriend, or even to just rest and relax, I have had to sit and wait first. Imagine, when I have work to do for an employer! How much stress and how much risk that is. And yes, this is on different addresses, different phone numbers, different computers, different wifi, different phones. For more than 20 years in a country like Sweden, who claims be at the forefront of app development?

This in turn, doesn't really make me in a good mood to be loving, now does it? Just like having to struggle with being allowed to sleep and eat under my own rented roof without having to file 15 appeals per year or beg on the street all the time, besides becoming awakened by Malin Berghagen four nights per week. As if the Swedish goverment doesn't understand that themselves? Do they hate noble, intelligent, brunettes that much? Why don't they use me as a resource themselves? I just don't get it. But, if they don't want me to pay back my more than million SEK of studentloan debt, since they refuse me to work, that's their choice. If they don't want me to work and save up my own private pension instead of living on social security, ie state funds, that's their choice. I can't even buy a regular, good size bed, for grant money, without it being called an income, deducted from my social security.

So what really is being taken from me, is love. That you see, is the real reason why I need to move to another country. To be allowed to keep my peace, my home, my health, so I can work and contribute to society, and share love with a husband of mutual choice. Hopefully, it soon becomes time to.