Something I like doing for my own health and sanity, is to remember to define myself and what I can, more. In this way, I can individuate and thus separate myself from what I feel, is an overload of sought oneness in society, where so many follow out of insecurity, leaving even their own specialties behind. It drives me nuts, when I try very hard to be different. To be first with my creative pursuits.
It turns out that this in fact is a defined state, called enmeshment, that was introduced to me in the book "The Language of Emotions" by Karla McLaren, and also explained here. There are so many examples that resonates with me, such as having to be a friend, or even a parent, to your parents. Then this type of "diagnosing" can be such a comfort. And to find my own ways of dealing with it to be similar. Today I realised, I have never asked myself the question: What is best for me? Wow! Talk about healing my inner child!
So, how do we define ourselves? Instead of comparing with others for competition, think of what makes you unique and stand out. What do you have that others don't? Which differences are your strengths? What fits you? And how do you describe yourself, while also envisioning your longing and what you think is important?
There you are. A centring inside your core.